moments of clarity
i came upon a realization about myself this morning. i’m an enabler. it’s a pattern that i’ve had my entire life and it’s time to change it. i don’t want to spend my life bending over backwards for people and making sure that i’m always there for them when in my times of need they are nowhere to be seen. that’s a problem for me, because then i have a support system that’s actually a mirage. no one wants that in life!
the hard part is going to be learning how to say no. the past year of my life has been tumultuous, to say the least, and slowly but surely true colors are beginning to show. i’m discovering that the most important part of staying true to yourself is making time for yourself. also something that i’ve been terrible at for my entire life. keeping busy has always been a favorite activity of mine, and i would often crash every few months and be bedridden for days at a time.
so, today’s lessons: you come first, personal time, and everything in moderation (that doesn’t apply to food).